Friday, April 12, 2013

Our Daughter Grew Her Wings

On April 10, 2013 Aubrey Elizabeth Brown grew her wings and was born sleeping. She was born at 8:33AM CST. She weighed 10 oz and was 9 inches long. She was born at 20 weeks and 5 days after two hard days of labor. My baby girl was the cutest and most precious thing I have ever seen in my life. I will write my birth story when I feel up to it. I just wanted to share that our daughter arrived. We got to spend 7 beautiful hours with her before the funeral home came to get her. We would have been able to spend more but she was going down hill too fast.
We chose to have her cremated. Her ashes should be ready for my husband and I to collect on Monday. My wonderful inlaws purchased her urn for us. I cannot wait to see it in person. I bought myself an urn necklace to hold some of her ashes in as well. 
I wanted to share a few pictures. For personal reasons, I will not be showing a full body picture of her. 
Our Family Photo

Her tiny fingers and hands
My husband holding his first born. His baby girl. This picture is so powerful.

I held her for so long. I did not want to let go.
Her tiny foot and hand. This was taken after we took her footprints.
Her tiny tiny foot with her daddy's wedding ring.

The hospital gave us this beautiful memorial box to keep all of her things in. I have her itty bitty dress and The nurses  pitched in to give me the Remembrance Angel. My husband bought me these flowers while I was in labor. I am so thankful that the nurses and doctors treated my husband and I so well. I will never forget my angel. I cry so much. I want her back. I fell asleep with her blanket lastnight. It still smells like her! My husband has been such an amazing person through all of this. He is my rock. I am in tears writing all of this. I will update with how things are going soon. RIP babygirl We love you so much. We want you in our arms so bad again. I want to kiss that itty bitty nose again. This is not fair. You left too early! I want you back!!!!!


EDIT: I have had people ask about helping out. We set up a Paypal to pay medical bills and such. The Paypal Email [AubreyElizabethFund@gmail.com] is in honor or my daughters name. Thank you all for your kind words in this tragic time in our lives.

32 comments:

  1. Oh Brenda, My heart breaks for you! My sincerest condolences to you and your entire family. I know how hard it is to lose a child, especially one you've longed for. My heart is with you!

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  2. My heart breaks for you. I'm so sorry you have to go through this, its not fair! Will be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

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  3. I can't even begin to imagine what you are going through. Thank you for sharing these special photos. Sending prayers!

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  4. I commented on FB but I wanted to comment here too. Your story hits very close to home for me and I want you to know that if you ever ever need someone to talk to please feel free to contact me. I know we don't know each other and this is actually the first comment I think I have left here, but if you just feel like you need to talk to someone who has been in your shoes before I'm here for you. When you're ready I have some great resources which might help you through the healing process. Your angel is beautiful and you will cherish every last picture you have of her for years to come. My thoughts are with you and your family.

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  5. As I told you earlier, every time I hug you or Jon, I'm hugging a part of her. I will forever cherish the short time I was able to hold her.

    Aubrey, you're forever in my heart. I love you and your parents. ~ Nana

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  6. Very touching. The hospital sounds like they treated you so nicely. Take care! I really like the idea of the necklace. I wish I had something to say to take away the pain for you.

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  7. It's very hard to find words at such a sad and heartbreaking time. My sincere condolences to you and your family.

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  8. praying for you! I was with my sister as her firstborn was born sleeping at 20 weeks also. Sending love and prayers your way!

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  9. I am sadden by your lose. I pray that God replaces your tears and pain with the happy memories of her growing inside you & the excitement your husband and family displayed. Your future children will not replace this beautiful little go so anxious to see her mommy but you will have a new place in your heart for each of them.

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  10. You and Aubrey Elizabeth are in my prayers. I am so very, very sorry.

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  11. I'm so so sorry for your loss. My heart breaks for you and I wish there was a way for me to help. All I can offer is my prayers. You, your husband and and your beautiful little girl will be in my prayers and heart always. Rest in Peace Sweet Baby Aubrey <3

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  12. I am sorry you have to join with us other angel mommies. I know your road feels dark and lonely. Know you are not alone and you can get through this. I am crying right now for you. I am so so so sorry.

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  13. Oh Brenda, my heart weeps for your loss, I share your sorrow as I recall my son also having been given his wings at birth. We are walking with you.

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  14. Brenda, I am so sorry for your loss. Your family will be in my prayers. Hugs!

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  15. Praying for your family Brenda. I'm so sorry for the loss of your little girl.

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  16. I am so very sorry to hear of your loss.

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  17. My prayers are with your family. When I had a miscarriage I found a lot of support here: http://www.hannah.org/
    There are forms for m/c and stillbirth and infant loss.

    So very sorry. You will hold your baby in Heaven.

    Janice

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  18. Your pictures brought me to tears. I feel your pain. I lost my daughter at 26 weeks. I know we don't know each other, but if you ever need to talk to someone, please, please feel free to email me Debi@thespringmount6pack.com.

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  19. Thank you all so much. I did not miscarry her. She was kicking up until she made her way out of my cervix. She was born sleeping still. There is a difference between the two. =]

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  20. my heart aches for you and your husband. so brave of you to share you story. Your daughter is a beautiful angel watching over you both now. I hope you can feel peace from her presence.

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  21. I'm so sorry that this happened. Your pictures of her are beautiful and will be your connection to her until you are able to be with her again. Very powerful pictures - and they show so much of your feelings. I wish you peace in your hearts.

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  22. From one mother to another, my heart cries for you.
    Sending my deepest condolences.

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  23. How brave of you to share your story. My heart aches for you. I will keep thinking about you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

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  24. I'm so sorry. Thank you for being brave and sharing your story with us. Sending love and prayers.

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  25. You are such a strong and brave woman. Thank you for sharing your story. I'm very sorry for your loss.

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  26. My heart breaks reading this, hugs to your family <3

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  27. My heart is breaking for you right now. I have no words other than you are in so many thoughts and prayers this morning.

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  28. I am so sorry. There just aren't any words. Prayers for you and your husband!

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  29. It may be hard to think now but all I can say is that God has a plan for everything, you may not be able to comprehend it now but later on I know you will...

    God bless and take your rest...


    Hugs,

    Icar

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  30. So sorry for your loss. I can't imagine the pain you are feeling and know there are no words that will make it go away.

    Thank you for sharing your beautiful pictures with us.

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  31. I know in a time like this "sorry" means nothing, but I really am sorry for your loss. My heart breaks for you and your husband. Please know you are in my thoughts.

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  32. One thing that has brought me a little comfort is my daughter's urn right next to my bed every night and in the living room during the day. I hope you will find some comfort having her with you.

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Thanks for visiting! If you have any questions or concerns, please email me at bbrown@thesmallthings89.com! ~Bre