Mother's Day was not what I would have wanted it to be. Nothing is going to bring Aubrey back so I was already down in the dumps about husband woke me with chest pains. I swear that poor man has had it rough. Usually he is the one taking care of me, making sure that *I* am okay. Today it is my turn. We rushed to the ER and they did a EKG. It was abnormal. They admitted him to the hospital so here I sit watching my sweet husband sleep while nurses come in and check on him. They plan to do a stress test on his heart tomorrow.
We never get a break. When will things just be "okay" for once? Who knows. 
If something isn't happening to him, it is happening to me or the both of us at once. I really hope the rest of the year is not as bad as this has been.The emotional heartbreak that recent events has caused us would be enough for one's lifetime.
The financial rut has really sucked as well. But out of respect to my husband I choose not to talk about that on here and I will not go into detail.
I wish we could be normal. I will never know what normal is again after losing Aubrey though..I just have to learn how to deal with my pain in more ways than one. We do not even have enough time to recover from one thing and another happens! =(  My emotions are all over the place..not to mention I am back where our daughter passed away. I hate this place..BUT I will stay by my husbands side.
My birthday is coming up on June 3rd. Hopefully we can do something nice. Maybe the rest of the year will be better..who knows what 2014 is going to bring? It better be a better year than this one, I do know that much.
It would be NICE to get away from here and go to the beach. I have NEVER been to the beach..maybe we can have a honeymoon. We never got one of those when we were married in November 2011. 
Well, I guess that is all for now..

Jon got to come home today. I know he was only admitted overnight but it was still scary =(  He is FINE but has high blood pressure. They gave him meds for it. His stress test came back NORMAL! That was great news to hear!
My head hurts from crying. It has been a really emotional day.
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  1. I am so very lucky to have you as my wife. I am always ready and willing to be by your side, and I am lucky to have you by mine at my time of need. You are an amazing young woman, and I cannot believe someone would've messed up enough to have let you go, but I'm glad it happened so we can have our life together. I am so very happy, lucky, thankful, and all those other words that describe happy and stuff! :)


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